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Last winter, a month after turning 22, I began to lose my hair.
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Stepping into a warm morning shower was no longer a calming daily ritual, but one I begrudgingly feared.
Soon, brushing my hair became another dreaded activity for the same reason.
The root of the problem turned out to betelogen effluvium but more on that later.
Long before I moved to Copenhagen, I’d watched the density of my mother’s hair decline.
When I wasn’t clip-clopping in my mum’s stilettos, I was usually hand-in-hand with my grandmother.
She had little interest in makeup, which, truthfully, I loved about her.
One evening when I was around eight, she sat by my bed as I fell asleep.
As she slowly stroked my hair, I dozed in and out of consciousness.
I was confused, so my mum sat me down the following day to talk about hair loss.
Realizing that aspect of physical appearance is temporary, I fell in love with my hair.
It was like looking in a mirror.
I knew the real fix needed to happen inside my head, not on it.
When I looked in the mirror, I didn’t recognize myself.
“Diagnosing telogen effluviumis the easy bit.
Over the following months, as I formed healthier routines, I tried and struggled to mentally adapt.
As my hair fell, so did my confidence, and with that, my anxiety peaked.
I deleteddating apps, pressed pause on making new friends, and canceled events.
To experience hair loss side by side with my mother?
Well, it wasn’t quite what I envisioned.
“The impact of hair loss in women can be enormous.
The stress-tress connection is real.”
“Physical appearance holds value because we are socialized and conditioned to believe that it determines human worth.”
As a result, the state of our physical identity can alter our mental andemotional well-being.
Dr. Wong adds that hair can cause situational stress.
The stress-tress connection is real.”
In the grand scheme of things, the density of my hair was and still is a trivial matter.
So finally, one night, I asked my friend Erik to cut my hair.
We were in downtown Copenhagen watching the a championship football game, celebrating with friends, old and new.
As the crowd cheered in unison, I was momentarily distracted by the girl standing in front of me.
Her enthusiasm was infectious: I didn’t know her, but I instantly admired her.
Then I noticed her hair, a short curly bob.
After the match, we returned to my apartment and convened in the bathroom with a pair of scissors.
Instantly, my hair looked fuller and healthier, something I needed to maintain.
I implemented some new hair-care rules, too.
To take care of my hair in the shower, I incorporated gentler shampoo and conditioner into my routine.
I made life changes, too.
I re-downloaded dating apps and put extra effort into socializing and making new friends.
And if someonewasto judge my worth on my physical appearance, were theyreallysomeone I wanted in my life?
After all, beauty is not defined by our hair.
As my hair regains thickness, I’ll still brush it back into an up-do more often than not.
But when I style my hair down, I wear it with confidence.
Read more from The Truth About Hair Loss:
Now, watch one person’s washday routine:
