The first thingBillie Eilishdoes when she walks into the room is challenge me to a game of Ping-Pong.
I accept, despite knowing none of the rules and having the coordination of a hallucinating puppy.
Valentino shirt and tie.
Valentino shirt and tie. Chrome Hearts rings.
Its a return to a previous look.
Shes spent time, serious time, wading out of the rough waters she used to surf.
And once you know, you might heal from that.
Valentino shirt and tie. Chrome Hearts rings.
But what Ive learned…is that time goes by, and Im still scarred.
You dont have to push into pain to get out of pain.
Ive done that, and I dont want to do it again.
The room transforms from a studio space to something like a confessional.
Maybe its one of the ways she comforts herself after shes been vulnerable.
I ask what she does to get back into her body when she feels overexposed.
Rains cape. Bulgari earrings.
“I feel best right out of the shower, with my lotions and my smells.”
She picks up the bottles, which are miniature busts of herself in profile.
The red bottle before us holds only water, as its still in production.
Balenciaga hoodie and coat. To get the beauty look: Noir Lash London No. 6 and Alima Pure Velvet Lipstick in Stella. (Eilish is vegan and only vegan makeup was used on this shoot.)
The real perfume is in the sample bottle next to it.
She cradles it and sprays the scent in the air.
We both smile and wait for the fragrance to diffuse in the room.
Balenciaga hoodie and coat. To get the beauty look: Noir Lash London No. 6 and Alima Pure Velvet Lipstick in Stella. (Eilish is vegan and only vegan makeup was used on this shoot.)
The scent is sweet but metallic.
Balenciaga hoodie and coat.
To get the beauty look: Noir Lash London No.
Gucci shirt and pants. ERL shoes. Gucci earrings. Cartier rings.
6 and Alima Pure Velvet Lipstick in Stella.
(Eilish is vegan and only vegan makeup was used on this shoot.)
I love that it reminds me of metal, says Billie.
To get the beauty look: Hourglass Confession Ultra Slim High Intensity Lipstick in My Icon Is.
If you combined Eilish No.
Im trying to prioritize.
I said that three years ago, and then I didnt do it!
She waves her hands in the air.
So Im doing it now.
And Ive made enough people feel good that I deserve to feel good too.
Gucci shirt and earrings. Bulgari necklace. To get the beauty look: Noto Hydra Highlighter Stick and Charlotte Tilbury Vegan Lip Lustre in Ibiza Nights.
Gucci shirt and pants.
Speaking of songs, I bring up her latest megahit, What Was I Made For?
Shortly after our interview, it already had over 200,000,000 streams on Spotify alone.
Asai dress.
By any measure, a blazing success.
For Billie, it seemed to emerge from within.
“Ive made enough people feel good that I deserve to feel good too.”
To get the beauty look: Hourglass Confession Ultra Slim High Intensity Lipstick in My Icon Is.
That day we were making stuff, and were like, Weve lost it.
Why are we even doing this?
To get the beauty look: Alima Pure Natural Definition Brow Pencil and Mascara and Charlotte Tilbury Vegan Lip Lustre in Ibiza Nights.
She smiles a little at the memory.
A couple of days went by, and I realized it was about me.
Its everything I feel.
Eilish No. 3 will be the last fragrance in the collection that launched in 2021.
And its not just me everyone feels like that, eventually.
Gucci shirt and earrings.
To get the beauty look: Noto Hydra Highlighter Stick and Charlotte Tilbury Vegan Lip Lustre in Ibiza Nights.
The way the song has been heard and seen by women is so special to me, Billie says.
All the videos are devastating.
Her eyes are wide with emphasis.
It must be overwhelming, I say, to be the doorway to all those experiences.
And Billies voice is the connective tissue through them all.
Its wild, she says.
Does she ever want to hide from the exposure, the weight of all that fandom?
She stills, then shakes off the question, or the troubles it leads to.
Thats the thing about diving into the hurt I dont need to do that.
Im starting to do better, but Ive not been doing so great, to be honest.
I have impending-doom feelings most of the day.
But you have to let it go.
(I dont ask her about her relationship status.)
It was not a good time for ol Bill.
I was not getting better, and didnt know when I would.
I was sitting there like, Oh.
That means keeping things moving even when it might hurt.
Her focus now is refusing to settle.
I have settled many times with things and people and life.
Ive settled for less than I deserved, and Im not going to do that anymore.
It’s the closest thing to closure I can offer, really.
Theres no sophomore slump for her in either industry her songs sell well, her perfumes do too.
Both are industries that defer to older experts.
She smiles, wickedly now, revealing the mischievous nature you see in her music videos.
I have to give credit to the person Ive always been I did not give a fuck at all.
People could have done crazy shit, and I didnt let them.
I had ideas; I had plans.
She stops and nods to herself.
But the thing is, people should know women should know you dont have to be exceptional.
Still, she realizes how lucky shes been in her own evolution.
The more I think about being myself, the better my life is.
The moreI am myself, the better my life is.
3 will be the last fragrance in the collection that launched in 2021.
When I was 17, I was like, I found it.
I found the person I am, forever.
This is how Im going to do it.
I found all the ways!
These are my boundaries.
Then I grew up a little, and suddenly life was like, These arent going to work.
You’ve got to change.
You’re not that person anymore."
But the more I think about being myself, the better my life is.
It sounds like a secret shared between us, however simple the notion is.
you could tell she means it.
Our time together is just about over.
The perfume has settled into the couch, a final parting gift that conditions the leather just a bit.
Its still sweet but not cloying; it dances through the air with little effort.
Just like Billie, a dancer at heart.
She gets up to head outside.
I look at the Ping-Pong table behind us.
She turns to me as she opens the door, already moving on.
Im going to win next time, I say, nodding at the table.
And then shes gone.
