Jennifer Aniston has spent most of her adult life in the spotlight, with all its glare.
At 53, she opens up about her path to leaving regrets and some deeply personal pain behind.
Thats what people called her for a long time.
The girl next door, which is a 90s euphemism that means shes unintimidating, approachable.
Pruned trees, gurgling fountains, 500-foot-tall front doors.
Then suddenly, theres a lot of barking and Anistons familiar voice, somewhere inside, reprimanding herdogs.
Photographed by Zoey Grossman.
Fashion stylist: Shibon Kennedy.
Hair: Chris McMillan.
Makeup: Gucci Westman.
Manicure: Kim Truong and Diem Truong.
Set design: Jeremy Reimnitz/Spencer Vrooman Studio.
Excuse my frazzledness, she says, seeming pretty unfrazzled, as we walk into her kitchen.
I just had a whole thing happen at work.
Shes in the middle of filming the third season ofThe Morning Show.
I just [found out I] have a few pages to learn of a huge interview scene.
Our interview can be a dry run, I propose.
Yes, this will be my dry exactly.
Aniston at her most Aniston.
Its that thing she does.
She murmur repeats part bumbling professor, part conspiratorial best friend.
Immediately, shes welcoming: Can I make you a shake?
Im having a shake.
I am not about to refuse a homemade shake from Jennifer Aniston.
I want to introduce you to my dogs.
She opens the door to where theyve been relegated.
Clyde is amazing, but Chesterfield gets barky.
You have to ignore him.
I do as Im told: aloof and indifferent.
I could be a French waiter.
Okay, Im making us a shake.
I lean against her kitchen island and watch as Aniston begins to assemble the ingredients.
Am I okay with chocolate-flavored things?
Yep, but Im a vegetarian so just no bacon, kindly.
Im not going to put the bacon in!
Ill leave out the bacon.
Ill leave out the bacon.
Murmur, repeat, perfect timing.Let me blend this.
Chesterfield a big white husky?
She pours two tall glasses of smoothie.
Whoa, I hope you like sweet things, she says.
Gucci spring 1997 logo G-string provided by El Cycer Vintage.
We move to the living room and step into two sides of Jennifer Aniston.
Theres a wall of artwork and floor-to-ceiling windows.
But there are also dog beds, a giant sofa with a slipcover, and a really casual vibe.
Shes not a coaster person.
Aniston sits on the floor and Chesterfield jumps on the couch next to me.
Earlier I was texting a journalist friend of mine.
I told him I was interviewing Aniston and I asked him to give me smart things to say.
One thought is this, he texted.
No ones ever going to be famous the way she is.
That kind of mass-fame phenomenon burning so bright for so long, its just not achievable today.
Shes like a silent-film star among a generation of TikTok dipshits.
I read her the text.
Oh, that just gave me chills, she says.
Im a little choked up.
I feel like its dying.
There are no more movie stars.
Theres no more glamour.
Even the Oscar parties used to be so fun….
Theres something thats distracting me.
But its not that.
Her hair is the second most famous thing in this house.
You could sayher hairwas the second most famous thing onFriends.
Its a little unsettling.
Like seeing your own reflection in Tom Cruises aviators.
Isa Boulder bra top.
Christian Dior spring 2003 logo embellished belt provided by El Cycer Vintage.
Then she says, I hatesocial media.
What do you mean?
Im not good at it.
This seems…counterintuitive.
As you may be aware, about three years ago,Aniston joined Instagram.
Is that what she means by not being good at it?
Like, is it hard because youre too popular?
Its torture for me.
The reason I went on Instagram was to launch this line, she explains.
Then the pandemic hit and we didnt launch.
So I was just stuck with being on Instagram.
It doesnt come naturally.
I ask her about this.
Look, the internet, great intentions, right?
Connect people socially, social networking.
It goes back to how young girls feel about themselves, compare and despair.
Isa Boulder bra top.
Christian Dior spring 2003 logo embellished belt provided by El Cycer Vintage.
Thats why I have such gratitude for all those shitty things.
She finishes her smoothie and reaches out to Chesterfield.
And now, I dont fucking care.
Maybe I look confused.
I was trying to get pregnant.
I had no idea.
Yeah, nobody does, she replies graciously.
All the years and years and years of speculation…
It was really hard.
I was going through IVF, drinking Chinese teas, you name it.
I was throwing everything at it.
I wouldve given anything if someone had said to me, Freeze your eggs.
Do yourself a favor.
You just dont think it.
So here I am today.
The ship has sailed.
We sit quietly for a minute, maybe sad for all the ships that have ever sailed.
I almost want to apologize to Aniston for being a journalist.
This doesnt feel like any of my business.
I have zero regrets, she says.
I actually feel a little relief now because there is no more, Can I?
I dont have to think about that anymore.
Back then and for years there were headlines swirling through pop culture that Aniston wouldnt have kids.
That she wasnt interested or she just wanted to be a star or whatever idea was selling that week.
I just cared about my career.
And God forbid a woman is successful and doesnt have a child.
It was absolute lies.
I dont have anything to hide at this point.
I have flashes of every magazine rack, every airport newsstand.
Those Jen Has a Baby Bump!
or equivalent headlines were everywhere (includingAllure).
We all felt entitled to the cellular happenings inside her uterus.
We consumed those headlines, then dropped them in the trash and got back to our lives.
I got so frustrated.
Chesterfield is back on the couch, trying to curl up on my leg.
I think my moms divorce really screwed her up, Aniston says when I ask her about growing up.
Back in that generation it wasnt like, Go totherapy, talk to somebody.
Why dont you startmicrodosing?
Chesterfield nudges deeper onto my lap.
Aniston pulls him off.
Come here, baby, she says.
I know you want to, but you just cant lick people.
Its one thing to be a dog person, but Aniston is next level.
I forgave my mom, she continues, getting back to her human family.
I forgave my father.
Ive forgiven my family.
(Aniston was estranged from her mother for years.)
Who among us hasnt tried successfully or not to forgive our family?
You in the back, put your hand down.
Youre lying to yourself.
Families are things to be forgiven.
Its important, she says.
Its toxic to have that resentment, that anger.
I learned that by watching my mom never let go of it.
I remember saying, Thank you for showing me what never to be.
Calle Del Mar bandeau and skirt.
One of the things her parents divorce gave her was motivation to leave.
I was thrilled to get out.
(Id make a shake and if there was leftover…?
I was rounder then, she says, arching her eyebrow.)
Eventually, I moved to California.
She arrived in Los Angeles the summer of 1989, which was yesterday, she says.
I walked into a party in Laurel Canyon.
This girl says, Come with us.
Were doing a circle.
I was like, Whats a circle?
It was all women and they saged you before you went in.
Then a talking stick, Im sure with feathers on it.
The women call in the four directions, and Im like, What the fuck is going on?
Am I in a cult?
Hours later, woman after woman, just speaking, sharing thoughts and fears, worries.
How incredible women are for each other.
Thats how I got into that world, which I guess would be called Woo Woo.
It was very Woo Woo.
The women of the Woo Woo circle remain her closest friends.
She met the woman who would become her producing partner that night.
Aniston is a case of life imitating art.
I remember in high school doing a Chekhov play, she says.
It wasnt funny, and I was making it funny.
And my teacher said, Why dont you just be funny because you have it in you?
And I was like, How dare you?
Im a dramatic actress!
Turns out, it was the thing that saved my life, comedy.
It was a salve to make people laugh.
We really loved each other and we took care of each other.
I dont know why it still resonates; there are no iPhones.
Its just people talking to each other.
Nobody talks to each other anymore.
Well, weve come this far.
Would you ever get married again?
Never say never, but I dont have any interest, she says.
Id love a relationship.
There are moments I want to just crawl up in a ball and say, I need support.
Smoothies long gone, Aniston gives me a tour of the house.
Imagine soaring views and spiritual shrines tucked into corners.
We walk into the dining room with its majestic table, heavy art books, charcoal walls.
A few paint swatches are affixed to the wall.
All in identical shades of charcoal.
I dont get it.
You cant see the difference?
Youd think I just told her how much I love the emperors splendid new clothing.
You cant see how blue this one is?
This is paint swatch gaslighting.
I would love to be an interior designer.
Im a very independent person.
Intimacy has always been a little here, she extends her hand an arms length in front of her.
Ive realized you will always be working on stuff.
I am a constant work in progress.
How uninteresting would life be if we all achieved enlightenment and that was it?
Gucci spring 1997 logo G-string provided by El Cycer Vintage.
Bulgari bracelet
Coming out on the other side is what she calls a little mosaic.
It gets blown apart and then somehow gets put back together into this beautiful mosaic.
I think of all the gossip and schadenfreude, all the hysterical tabloid exclamation points, the clickbait.
But maybe thats the point.
I didnt want to partner with someone until some of that work was done.
It wouldnt be fair, she says.
I dont want to move into a house when there are no walls.
You felt like you had no walls?
It was terrible, she says.
Across the yard from the main house is a small cottage thats about 90 percent windows.
Welcome to the Babe Cave, she says.
This was Justins office.
(Aniston and her ex-husband Justin Theroux split up in 2017.)
you might imagine he likes things black and dark.
After he moved out, I lightened it up, stripped it all.
He came over [the other day] and was like, What the fuck did you do?
I said, I brought the light back in, buddy.
Im going to do that one day, she says.
Im going to stop saying, I cant write.
We walk back out to the garden.
Ive spent so many years protecting my story about IVF.
The [world] creates narratives that arent true, so I might as well tell the truth.
I feel like Im coming out of hibernation.
I dont have anything to hide.
If you were writing the story of your life, I ask, what would you call this chapter?
What would you call this chapter?
We look out at Los Angeles, blurry in the late afternoon smog.
Fashion stylist:Shibon Kennedy.
Hair:Chris McMillan.
Makeup:Gucci Westman.
Manicure:Kim Truong and Diem Truong.
Set design:Jeremy Reimnitz/ Spencer Vrooman Studio.
Top Image:Magda Butrym coat.
