When my doctor announced those three words, at first, I wasnt sure whose she was talking about.
Thats the funny thing about timeit feels infinite, until its not.
I was accustomed to hard things.
From left to right: Getty Images, Courtesy of Tara Lipinski, Photography by Jenny Quicksall
I knew what it was like to fall and get back up.
To lose a competition and get back in the arena again.
To hit rock bottom and wake up early the next day to start training again.
Lipinski at home, clutching two negative pregnancy tests.
I had always prided myself on my resilience and my resolve to succeed.
In the face of adversity, I had always committed to positive thinking as my road to success.
For the first time in my life, my body felt like it was revolting against me.
Lipinski and her husband, Todd Kapostasy, with daughter Georgie, whom they welcomed last year via surrogate.
My body had always worked for me, until it didnt.
Lipinski at home, clutching two negative pregnancy tests.
When I lost my first pregnancy, I didnt bleed or have any physical signs of miscarrying.
Even through what felt like a complete blackout in that moment, I remember her discussing my options.
At the time, I was vaguely familiar with the termD&C, a dilation and curettage procedure.
I wanted… no, Ineededit to be over.
Carrying an unviable pregnancy has to be one of the most disturbing experiences.
Carrying an unviable pregnancy has to be one of the most disturbing experiences.
While that may sound hyperbolic, its not.
She died from septic shock.
I naively assumed that the effects of the pill the intense, contraction-like crampingwould not ensue before the procedure.
Unfortunately, I began to experience that unbearable, nearly indescribable pain in the middle of that night.
The pain was the most intense thing that I have ever experienced due to my already debilitating endometriosis.
I found myself sobbing on the floor for hours, unable to move.
I was terrified and felt like I had officially hit my rock bottom.
A phrase I had become all too familiar with at this point.
My fourth and final D&C the next morning was successful.
And if Im being honest with myself, I felt a huge sense of relief.
That is what a D&C is: a surgical abortion.
And that is a scary thought.
Lipinski and her husband, Todd Kapostasy, with daughter Georgie, whom they welcomed last year via surrogate.
Pregnancy loss doesnt care whether youve won a gold medal or not.
I am not unique.
Women deserve the medical access that they want, and need.
And I am living proof.
To read more Abortion Journals like these, visitWinx Health’sReal Talkplatform.
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