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I didn’t see abidetwith my own eyes until I was 14 years old.
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“What is that?”
I asked my mom.
“Oh, that’s a bidet,” she said.
“It’s for cleaning your butt.”
My adolescent brain was horrified.
What was this hellscape of inevitable humiliation my parents were moving me to?
“Do we have to get one of those when we move here?”
“No, no,” my mom assured me.
“Sometimes they just put weird stuff in these models.”
To this day, I haven’t tried one.
How did one of my best friends become weird, rich, and old without me noticing?
“It truly makes all the difference in the world,” they said.
Hez has never been one to mince words, and they made an excellent point.
Clearly, it’s time for me to reconsider the bidet.
How do bidets work?
Hold upthere are bidettiers?
“The traditional European style is an actual fixture that sits next to your toilet,” Lin explains.
“They’re the first image most Americans have of what a bidet looks like.”
I’m one of those Americans, clearly.
“They range in price from $20 to $150.”
Many even allow for customized stream intensity and adjustable nozzle angles.
“They range in price from $200 to $1,000.”
To put it simply, the more controls, the higher the price.
Despite growing up with a conventional stand-alone bidet, blogger and founder ofAfrobellaPatrice Grell Yursik prefers more modern options.
So when I was a teen, my mom and dad built a house with two bidets.
But of course, with more options comes a higher price.
This bidet attachment is $549, which is a bigger spend than the non-electric options previously mentioned.
They come down to two types, he explains: squeeze bottles and battery-powered.
The Luxe Portable Bidet, for example, is a simple squeeze bottle with a long nozzle.
Its better than having nothing while traveling, he notes, but its not a perfect everyday solution.
Why haven’t Americans hopped on the bidet train yet?
Despite the rising popularity of bidets, they are still very much a foreign concept to Americanssomewhat literally.
All of that is to say: Using a bidet is not just about feeling clean.
Toilet paper isn’t just wasteful, Lin adds, it’s inefficient.
He points out that toilet paper can sometimes leave behind residue.
Dont we use water to clean everything else in our lives?"
Says Dr. Ibrahim, toilet paper is especially likely to leave residue if its low quality or very soft.
They know that they don’t feel clean enough with toilet paper alone.
Oh, and bidets can handle poopandblood.
Yursik says her bidet isn’t only useful post-poop, it’s a game-changer during her period too.
“For many years of my life, I dealt with heavy bleeding and clots,” she says.
I would recommend it to anyone who has heavy periods."
Dr. Ibrahim says go for it.
Using a bidet can help with maintaining cleanliness and hygiene during menstruation, he says.
In fact, it wasmenstruationthat inspired my friend Hez to consider a bidet in the first place.
“I use period underwear because I’m more into free-bleeding.
It was a revelation.
“It had really good water pressure and I felt so fresh afterward,” they say.
“I was like, ‘We need an attachment at home.'”
So Hez made a small investment that they feel has paid for itself tenfold.
“I thought it would be too shocking, and maybe tickle or hurt.
But I can say with confidence that none of that is true.”
“Theres nothing silly, hippy, or bourgeois about bidets,” Hez concludes.
It’s just water.
Now read more stories about bathroom-based self-care:
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